When the children become the teacher, there's never a dull moment at the park

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We could all stand to learn a lesson in resilience, which kids teach best. I cannot recall a time in my childhood, where I turned away someone who wanted to be my friend or wanted to be my friend again. I can’t recall a moment, in my childhood, where something so terrible happened; whereby it prevented us from being able to stand in the same room, play together, eat together, walk to school together, get in trouble together and get out of trouble together. Most of the time, we had each other’s back in all instances and when something wasn’t right- we stood up for each other.

We were so resilient as children. I love to watch children play these days, for this very same reason. It’s a glimpse into the past. Holding on to those priceless moments of nostalgia, allows me to escape a reality that I live daily. One where people aren’t so resilient, where they harness grudges and nurture seeds of resentment and spite.

I simply love how resilient children are. First of all, upon meeting, they become friends right away. Especially in a built-in ‘Ice Breaker’ situation, such as: The park and the playground. They naturally fall into queue, taking turns on the slides. They run to and from, while yelling “tag!” you’re it! They race each other, and sometimes it’s ok when they loose. I said sometimes…. Nonetheless, they play for a while. Seconds turn to minutes and minutes soon turn to hours. By lunchtime, they are now the best friends, on the same team and so forth.

And then, it gets interesting: A small disagreement will get you kicked out of a child’s friendship circle, quicker than you could draw the circle itself. However, it’s by the same, simplistic – standard that they allow someone back into the circle. Which I believe is as simple as saying, I apologize, and do you want to be my friend again?” One minute you’re not my friend, the next minute you are my Beasties…. all is forgiven and all is forgotten. You can now play with my LEGO set again… We can share. I know this is my toy, but you can play with it for a little while.

To watch this, is sort of my private continuing education course, in how simple life should be. If only if it could be. If only so many more people, would visit… revisit the park on Saturdays and Sundays, to allow child’s play to inadvertently teach them a priceless lesson.

I make it a point to take my son to the park every other Saturday and Sunday. We spend countless hours there, and are usually the last to leave. We have our blankets to sit on, our designated area, pic-nic style, extra change of clothes for the just in case, water, small snacks, a cooler with goodies … ice and sometimes hotdogs. You never know. Whatever we can fit into the kit and caboodle. I will usually take a book out or a writing pad to journalize the moment.

After my child has played with a ‘child– member,’ of just about every family that can be represented, during light or heavy rotation at the park; depending on the weekend, he will give in to the 7 P.M. bath and dinner. This is a typical Saturday or Sunday for us. I never rush him to leave, even when I am tired and ready, because I do still love to watch his social skills develop. And lord knows he’s come a long way from when he used to send my anxiety overboard about going to the park. Because not too long ago, I was the parent who was always apologizing on the playground, to the other kids and parents because my extremely competitive son, had just bulldozed someone.Occasionally, we met some pretty amazing people who remind me that they are just kids, and the parents totally understand. It’s O.K. Breathe….

With that, I now go to the part a little less worried about my child body slamming someone. I’m joking. My child has absolutely never body slammed anyone’s child. But he has told them that they can’t do it like him. We are still working on polishing the delivery of his presentation. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being competitive, as long as it’s healthy competition, not bullying. I love when my son has these match ups at the park, when he meets other children who can hold their own. It minimizes my anxiety. I don’t feel that I have to look over his shoulder and micro manage his fun at the park, when he’s playing with someone who’s going to dish it out the same. I can allow my son, to be a boy… he can be the rough little boy he wants to be, that means no harm- just wants to play.

When this happens, as it did this particular weekend with Malik, where he matched up perfectly with Cornelius, it neutralizes everything. Now, that it something, that is pretty surreal to watch. Not in a sense where my son is backing down to someone who is bossing him around, but that there becomes a happy medium, an understanding between the kids, if you will. When this is achieved, it allows the mothers at the park, the freedom of sitting back and letting their own guard down. These days, I actually keep our entire park set up in the trunk of the car, so that we stay ready. I guess we are the park O.G’S lol (O.G. just sounded really good.)

The park has become second home to us; a place where we meet new family each week. Some live in the area, some were passing through. We meet or reconnect with extended family and though that may change from week to week, they always leave remarkable and memorable impressions on us. They each have a story to tell and we have another one to tell, upon departure. We enjoy each other’s company, while the moments in the park unfold. We appreciate the park for what it is, a holding place for the abridged version of life….. It is a place where we can go and live our simple life, and for a brief moment, just forget about everything else. These moments remind me of that Once upon a time… when we were young and resilient. When we could play with anyone.

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